Reflections

It's been a hard couple of weeks. Not necessarily for myself, but for everyone else it seems. The father of two of my young women passed away last week. Even though it was expected, it's been hard. As a new leader, my heart just aches for them. I know it's going to be a difficult road to healing, and trying to figure out what I can do to help them makes my head spin. On the plus side, we had a very spiritual sacrament meeting Sunday on trials. Two people gave really good talks. Then a lady in our ward sang an awesome song she was inspired to sing about trials that says something like "after the rain, after the pain...you'll find what you were really meant to be..." I wish I could quote the lyrics because they were great. And then the 1st counselor in the bishopric gave a talk written by the man who died. He was inspired to ask him to speak in sacrament meeting, but put it off not knowing what to do since he couldn't be there for health reasons. They finally talked and decided either the counselor in the bishopric or the wife would read the talk if he would write it at home. Holy cow, there wasn't a dry eye in the congregation. It talked about his life and story, but mainly about faith. We went over by 10 or 15 minutes and nobody cared one bit. The kids were even noisy and it's like you could just tune them out to listen to this inspirational talk. It sounds weird, but I can see the potential good that could come from his death - the bonding and unity that was there that day is amazing.

I gave my first lesson on Sunday to two very quiet Beehives. And I was so prepared too. Man! The Beehive advisor wasn't even there to help answer questions, although the new secretary in YW did sit in with me so I wouldn't be totally alone. Um, yeah, pretty sure I heard crickets. I went home wondering if I was cut out for this "job" or not. Let's just say I'm feeling pretty inadequate. The new YW president is truly amazing. I had talked to her a couple of times before I was called, but as I am getting to know her better, she just blows me away. She's the type of person I would like to be some day. She always seems to have the spirit with her and knows just what to do - even in tricky situations. And the 1st counselor has been in YW for awhile now so she's totally in her groove. I'm like a fish out of water right now. So yeah, overwhelming and emotional moments - and much spiritual doubt. It seems like any time there is a change or just that I'm trying harder and working to be more spiritual, I feel the adversary right there pushing against me. A few too many crazy wife moments in the Uboldi home this week. Gives me hope that we really must be doing something right if Satan thinks he needs to work so hard on us. So that's why I haven't been around. It's been crazy busy - between playing too hard, needing to catch up on my household chores, new calling responsibilities and my own deep thoughts, I haven't had time or desire to say much.

And off the subject a bit...this private blogging thing is weird. We'll see how it goes. I invited just the people that requested and ones I know read, but probably hadn't seen the post yet and I'm getting close to the limit. Why is there a limit anyway? So you either have to have less than 100 friends and family or you can't be private. Weird. I'll try not to make any new friends I guess. :)