Wednesday, July 21, 2010

The Birth Story

Thanks to my mom, I'm alone with Marissa today. Marcos dropped the boys off at her house so I could get some rest. It's been a long, less-than-restful few days and my body was definitely feeling it. I've been resting and sleeping all morning and now I thought I'd try to be productive in my own way. So here is my probably way too long journal-entry type of blog post of the birth story. So for those who don't care, you may want to skip this one.

A week ago Tuesday (July 13) I had pretty good contractions all night. They weren't super intense, but were often enough that I was up a couple hours during the middle of the night. I was working on a video of girls' camp to show at the activity the next day so I stayed up working on that when I couldn't sleep through the contractions. Luckily I had a doctor appointment Wednesday so I knew I could figure out how much progress I had made at that point. I hadn't been to an appointment in two weeks because of girls' camp and I was at a 1 at that time. My midwife was out of town so I had an appointment with another midwife who told me I was at a 3 on Wednesday. I was still having pretty good contractions though, but wasn't anxious to go into the hospital until I was sure I was in labor. I went to the activity that night and by bedtime the contractions had stopped. Shoot...or maybe it was a good thing since my midwife was out of town and I really wanted her to deliver the baby.

Thursday evening (July 15) Marcos, the boys and I went for a walk at the park to see if I could get my contractions started again. Nothing too strenuous, but it was weird that I hadn't had any contractions at all after two days of pretty consistent contractions. Thursday night we had a YW meeting to try to plan the rest of the summer. Things have been super crazy and we needed to get things organized a bit. I forgot about the meeting and ended up getting a call reminding me it had started. And of course Marcos was at a soccer game so I had to bring the kids. He took the kids home after the meeting though while I stayed to unwind and talk to the YW president a bit. I was feeling frazzled and started having contractions again. I was timing them while we were talking and it was getting pretty hard to determine when one stopped and the next began. They were fine, but definitely getting stronger as the time passed. I finally told her I thought I should call Marcos because it was getting to where I almost didn't want to stand up and try to walk to the car. Very weird how quickly that happened. I ended up taking her oldest son home with me in case we had to leave for the hospital before my mom could get to our house since the boys were already asleep in bed. This was around 11 p.m. I called my mom who grabbed her stuff and headed to our house to stay with the boys. Marcos tried to get a couple things done (like folding laundry) and then we headed out the door to the hospital. My biggest fear was going and being sent back home. I really wanted to go when we were in labor not before.

At the hospital, my nurse told me I was still at a 3 so that wouldn't be considered active labor since I was a 3 the day before and active labor was defined as cervical change. Whatever lady! My contractions were between 2 and 3 minutes apart and over a minute long and were definitely getting stronger. She called my midwife though, who was back in town at this point, and she told us to walk for a bit and see if there was any change before we left to go home. Okay then. Marcos and I walked that floor from about 2 a.m. until 3:30 a.m. We went at a decent pace most of the time until I started feeling quite a bit of pain, but were able to do 2 full miles (34 laps around the floor). I know, even in labor I have weird goals that I just can't let go of. It was fun talking in the middle of the night since Marcos tends to get a bit loopy when he's tired. Our conversations were productive and funny at the same time. I love that I have such a cute, supportive husband who would walk a couple miles with me in the middle of the night.
The nurses were working on bracelets so we had them make us matching ones to remember our night in the hospital. He chose light blue and white for Argentina and then we realized we should have done something girlie since we were having a girl. Oh well, that was an afterthought. So we finished our final lap and went back in to be checked again. The contractions were definitely stronger at this point and I was praying we wouldn't get sent home. She checked me and I was at a 4+. Okay, good. But she said the head was still pretty high and was worried if they kept me, they would end up having to induce me to keep labor going. I guess they've gotten really weird about inductions. So there I am having some pretty good contractions and they are probably going to send me home at 4 a.m. Marcos was worried about going to work after not sleeping all night. I told him he was crazy for even considering it. Then it hit me. I started throwing up. Yeah right. If this wasn't active labor, I didn't know what was. I felt like garbage and my body was showing it. Throwing up, shaking, etc. Anyway, she told me they thought they should send me home with a shot of pain medicine and something for a nausea so I could sleep and come back when the contractions were stronger. Okay lady. I was just happy to get something to make me stop throwing up. That's the one regret I have I guess. I ended up having a shot of morphine and fenergren, which really made me tired. But that was the point since they were going to send me home to try to sleep a bit.

Then they had a shift change and the new nurse came in to talk to me. She mentioned she was surprised they were going to send me home at a 4+ on my 3rd baby when my contractions were only 2 minutes apart, but said she would talk to her supervisor. The supervisor told her to check me again and see what happened. Low and behold I was now at a 5+ and there was no way she was sending me home. At this point I think it was around 5:30 a.m. We were still in the uncomfortable room where they decide if they keep you and had seen many women come and go. It's crazy to see how many women come in screaming, dilated to a 1 and unable to deal with even being checked. Screaming doesn't usually help the pain so I choose not to, but whatever. Anyway, my nurse asked me if I would want my epidural soon since I was obviously progressing quickly. I asked her who was on and it was the same doctor who gave me my last epidural, which for those who don't know was not the best experience. I asked her when his shift ended and it was at 7 a.m. I told her I would wait for the new doc to come on shift. Yay! That was a blessing. I was dreading getting him again and knowing I would have a different anesthesiologist was a huge relief. I got admitted and settled in my room and then was hooked up with my epidural first thing. I told him I thought I could wait since I'd had a shot of morphine and wasn't feeling the pain nearly as much, but he had two scheduled c sections and several other labors and told me if I didn't get it now, there was a chance he wouldn't get to me in time. Okay, decision made. Sign me up. It was perfect! I think it was on the lighter side because I was still able to move my legs to lift myself up and stuff, but I didn't feel the pain so it was perfect. Crazy detail, I know, but these things are important to me.

Like I said, the only negative turned out to be the morphine shot, which unfortunately couldn't be predicted. If I would have known I was for sure staying, I wouldn't have had it, but oh well. Live and learn. I was just really tired during a lot of the labor and even later into the day. It seemed to take forever to wear off. Anyway, my midwife came in shortly after I had the epidural and I was at an 8 already. She had been up all night and delivered several babies so it was a good thing she didn't have appointments at the office that day. Not too long after she left, the nurse came in. I told her I was feeling like the pressure to push and she checked me even though it hadn't been that long since my midwife had checked me. Sure enough I was completely dilated and ready to push. It was a rush to get everything in place at that point. I had told them that the deliveries were usually fast so they reminded me not to push through the contractions. I had three contractions where I had to literally try not to push and just hold still so the baby wouldn't be born yet. My midwife got there, they set everyone up and called in the nursery and then I pushed. I was a little worried that my pushing might not be as good as it was with the boys because I felt a little drugged, but I was fine. I started pushing and the head was basically right there. All of a sudden, I heard one of the nurses say, "We have cord" and I was a little freaked out. It's stuff they're all really used to, but you don't know what to do as the patient, the mom, who is pushing. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to push or not, so I waited for instructions. Let me tell you how much I love my midwife. She was so calm, but went from simple delivery, pushing instructions to a woman with a physically demanding job. She grabbed the cord and just pulled it right over the baby's head. It was pretty amazing, and yet still a bit scary. Her shoulders were kind of coming out crooked so the nurses were up ready to push on my belly and help get her out. I was just waiting to be told to push again and even said, "Should I push again" but my midwife just grabbed the shoulders and pulled her out. I think they were worried about her getting stuck or breaking her collar bone, which is pretty common, especially with bigger babies. Anyway, she was out and on my stomach, but not really crying a lot so they took her over to the table to get her breathing better. I tore a little bit so my midwife was stitching me up during this time and all I could do was look over at my little girl and wonder what was going on. I was squeezing Marcos' hand so hard the longer time went on. I think my midwife must have caught a glance of the look on my face and finally said, "She's fine. If there was something really wrong, they wouldn't still be in this room. They're just working on her because she's not responding as quickly as they would have liked." And I knew she meant it. It was a pretty emotional moment, but sure enough, she was fine. I'm guessing she was just feeling a little drugged just like me. Again, the one thing I would change if I would do it all again, but at the time it felt like the best thing to do so I could go home and get some sleep despite the contractions. Let me just say I was shocked when they told me I had a 9 lb baby. The entire time, she'd been measuring totally average and even two days before at my appointment, her estimated weight was 7 lbs 10 oz. They don't account for chubby cheeks and filled out arms and legs on the ultrasound though. I was just thrilled with my chunky little daughter, even if she did already look like she was a month old. She was beautiful and perfect and I couldn't help but feel so blessed to have her in my life.

Marcos filmed a little bit of this. We haven't seen it yet though. It'll be interesting to see how it comes out since he was trying to be a videographer, photographer and supportive husband all at once. My mom brought the boys up to see their new sister before we even transferred rooms. Poor Dylan was emotional, although he was trying to hide it because Tony (his cousin) was there. He had been really worried about something happening to me or the baby when she was born so I think part of it was relief and the other part was just joy to have a baby sister. He really is such a sensitive little guy. He had his face turned to look out the window and told me he had something in his eye. I told him it was okay to feel emotional and he just started crying and climbed up to give me a hug. It was a very sweet mom moment for me. That kid is a true blessing in my life! Preston held the baby for a minute and was quick to give her kisses, but was clearly out of his element. He was kind of running around, climbing on things and looking out the window. And he didn't want anything to do with me. I think me in a hospital gown looking way different weirded him out, plus there was just too much to see and do for him to focus. I was worried about him for a minute. They didn't stay long, but we got a couple pictures and then my mom took them to play at her house. Marcos went down to the nursery to film and watch the baby get her first bath while I got ready to go to post partum. I'm sure most of you can relate to what I'm going to say, but it is such a relief to have a husband who can go with your baby while you try to get yourself settled and taken care of. It's a weird, scary feeling to be separated from your newborn when you've been connected for over nine months and it's comforting to know someone is there to make sure everything is okay and can report on the baby if needed.

We had a pretty restful day, which is good since I was still feeling so tired. Missing a whole night's sleep, having a shot of morphine and going through labor was more than I bargained for and my body was definitely mad at me. Marissa was good at eating though, which was a true blessing. My biggest fear was having her end up in the NICU like Preston for low glucose. I guess with bigger babies they monitor their blood sugar levels really closely (they checked her levels every 4-6 hours) and I had this major fear that my baby would be taken away from me and put on monitors just like had happened with Preston. Thankfully she did really well and her sugars, even without any formula, stayed well within the acceptable level. Yay baby!

Melissa (my sister) came back with Tony and Dylan that night. My mom stayed with Preston since he was quite a handful at the hospital. Mercedes also came by to see our little Marissa Nicole. They held her and then left when it was time to feed her again. I thought they might come back, but I was so exhausted that we called and told them we were going to go to bed after she ate. Marcos pulled the reclining chair up next to me and slept on it that night. He said he wasn't that comfortable, but that he was so tired he slept all night. I guess so. The next morning I was talking about how she ate during the night and he had no idea anyone had even been in the room. I just had to laugh. Pretty much between getting vitals checked on her and on me and feedings, I was up every hour or two...and he had no idea. Hilarious!

Saturday morning Angie (my sister) and Justin stopped by. They had to wait with the kids and come in one at a time, but that was okay. It was so good to see Angie. I was so glad she was coming down that day anyway. My dad and Suzanne stopped by as well, but nobody stayed very long. I was still so dang tired and not really recovered having not slept well that night so it was good that everyone stopped by and then left so I could try to rest some more. Amy (my sister-in-law) stopped by as well to see the baby. Marcos felt bad that Gabi couldn't see the baby so he took her to see Gabi and got in trouble. He didn't realize you weren't supposed to take the baby outside the doors on the floor. Rule breaker! And I was just in a daze the whole time.

By that point I was done with the hospital. I didn't want to keep worrying about blood sugar levels and monitors and not sleeping or being comfortable. I wanted to go home and see my boys and just feel normal. So we started the process of being discharged. It took forever, but at some point, we were cleared to go home. Melissa had taken Dylan swimming and my mom had Preston. She went and bought us a brand new car seat and brought it up to the hospital. My mom loves us a lot and just wants to help. She was so sweet to help with so much and ended up buying a bunch of stuff for the baby as well. There is no way to even begin to thank her...but then I guess that's what moms are for. I just hope I can be the kind of mom to my kids that she has always been to me.

We went home and Melissa brought the boys home to us with some pizza for dinner that night. I ended up going outside to say goodbye to her and like three neighbors saw me and stopped to talk. By the end, I was hurting pretty badly standing there, but it's hard to say, "Oh, I should probably go sit down now." Oh well, that's been my challenge. Trying not to do too much so I end up pushing my healing backward.

Sunday Marcos slept in so they all missed church. The plan was for them to go, but whatever. We ended up going down to see my grandma Betty so she could see the baby and my dad stopped by to see Marissa again as well. Then we went home to rest and Alicia and Nate stopped by. Their kids had a stomach bug the Thursday before so they stayed away for several days to make sure they were way over it before they came to see the baby.

Since then life has been slow and busy all at once. Monday I had to take Marissa to the doctor to have her bilirubin levels rechecked and have her newborn appointment. Marcos took the boys swimming, which was perfect. I had to deal with the baby alone, but it was much less chaotic with the boys gone. Tuesday I had to take Dylan to the doctor and to a dentist appointment and Marcos had to go back to work so my mom came to watch the kids. It was crazy being up and about already, but what can you do when you have appointments that can't really be missed. And many friends and family have dropped in to say hello or bring a gift or a meal. It has been so nice. I just have to remember to let things go. I feel like helping the kids or cleaning things up and trying to get organized again, but then my body just hurts. So I'm trying to stay busy doing things like blogging while I let my body rest and my house get as messy as possible until I am well enough to attend to it properly.

Anyway, that's the story. Marcos and I have been talking about how weird it is that we are a mom and dad to three children. We get choked up talking about how blessed we feel and both still feel like we are in the twilight zone. It's like you are living your life, but you almost feel like you are looking down on yourself living your life at first while you get adjusted to such a major life change. But it's a beautiful thing. The boys are CRAZY about their sister. Dylan has been the biggest helper ever. He begged me to give her a bottle so he fed her her first bottle last night before bed. Preston can sit on the couch and hold Marissa while he watches a whole movie and never move a muscle except to bend down and kiss her head or belly every 3 minutes or so. It is so sweet. He says things like, "I want to hold the baby" or "Pwease can I hold Mrissa." He seems much more loving and normal already so I think it was the hospital that wigged him out and not the baby. But who knows? We're still very much in the transitional phase here so every day is a bit of an adventure, but one we wouldn't miss for the world! :)

1 comment:

Lisa said...

Wow! What a story about being in labor and them almost sending you home. Greg says he would have been pissed. But I'm glad it all ended up working out even if you both were a bit groggy with the morphine. I can't wait to see you! I want to make sure I don't wear you out though. I have a reunion on Sat. Aug. 7 in Bountiful. I might come up the afternoon before that and could stop by then. I will call you.