Handcart Trek 2008

These pictures are in no particular order.  I hate the way blogger uploads photos.  The top four pictures here were taken and edited by Britney, one of our girls.  I LOVE this picture of Marcos and me.  We look like a real Ma and Pa.  

Ma and Pa Uboldi

The boys and their blue bandanas

The girls

Pa, Britney and Ma 

(cute picture, but not exactly flattering with my big dress bunching in the front)

Daniel's 14th birthday

Brayden's mad dance skills and Jazmin, our social butterfly, were always entertaining us

Part of our family after the fireside on Sunday

Our bonded family the last day of trek

Meeting our family Thursday morning (all clean and ready to go)

Edgar, Weston, Thomas, Britney, Ma, Pa, Jazmin, Daniel, Alyssa, Hailey

Ben, Brayden

Pulling the handcart

The guys kickin' it country style

Ben, Brayden, Pa, Weston, Daniel, Thomas, Edgar

The girls frolicking in the meadow

Ma, Alyssa, Hailey, Jazmin, Britney

How do I even attempt to put into words our experience during trek?  I'm not sure I can do it justice.  I'll try to hit on the highlights without boring you with the journal details.  

The first day was pretty awkward.  I think they do that on purpose.  They don't put friends in the same families and they didn't give us any kids from our own ward.  We ended up with a few kids at the last minute that we didn't know we had too so just remembering names was difficult.  Looking back, we can laugh at the conversations that took place during the first moments of pushing and pulling.  So what's your name?  What grade are you in?  What do you like to do?  Oh, so you like the color blue, me too.  Stuff like that.  Awkward, but necessary.  The first day really is meant to break you down.  We walked around 12 miles total with our 300 pound handcart.  It was not an easy day.  People were hot, dirty, tired and emotional.  Sometime in the late afternoon we had the women's pull.  For those of you who don't know what that is, it's a type of reenactment of what happened when Brigham Young asked the men to join the Mormon Battalion and help fight in the Mexican-American war.  Many women were left alone for years.  We pulled the kids to the side and read them a portion of the history.  Marcos and I had watched a video from another stake's trek four years ago and were very moved by this part.  Marcos definitely didn't want to leave us behind to struggle.  I had to convince him that it would ruin the experience if he didn't let the women do it alone.  I was already crying just reading the story.  One sweet girl of ours trying to ease my pain said, "It's okay, Ma.  We don't have to pull all day.  It'll be over soon."  I was glad she said something because I was able to clarify why I was crying.  I told them that I was not crying for us or what we would have to suffer, but for those who had to actually say goodbye to their husbands and sons and carry on for years without them.  I cannot imagine that kind of sacrifice.  This was merely a moment to demonstrate that difficulty, but of course it would not last forever.  Could I actually carry on myself if this were real though.  I was told not to help the girls until they couldn't do it themselves, but with only four girls, they didn't make it too far without needing a little assistance.  After about 50 feet or so, they were pretty much stuck so I jumped onto the back to help push.  My girls pulling were about to fall over so part way up we traded positions.  It was really hard.  The cart would start to roll backwards and you just had to stick your position and breathe for a minute until you could all keep going again.  It was pretty humbling.  The hardest part I think was for the men up watching in silence.  I can only imagine how it would feel to watch us struggle and not be able to help.  After the pull was over, we gathered in families to discuss what we had accomplished.  The women felt so strong.  The men were truly humbled.  Marcos lead our discussion beautifully.  He started by saying how difficult it was to watch and said, "That's my wife, guys.  Do you know how hard it is to watch her struggle like that and have to sit back and watch?"  He asked our youngest boy who would turn 14 the next day how he would feel if that had been his mom pulling.  He just lost it.  He was crying so hard.  It was the sweetest thing I've ever seen.  Then Marcos looked at another girl who had come into our family with a pretty bad attitude and asked her for her thoughts.  After choking back tears for a minute she said, "I've just never known the church was true as much as I do now.  That was so hard.  No one would have sacrificed that way unless they knew it was true."  We all left feeling the spirit so strong.  Marcos talked a little to the guys about always helping women in life and not leaving them to push and pull alone.  It was truly a beautiful discussion.  The girl who it affected the most walked off to the side to pray and was still not ready when the handcarts pulled out.  I held back to wait for her.  I think that is when the family bonding really started.  

That night we set up the tarps around our wagon, ate dinner and got ready for bed.  The girls all helped each other, but most of the guys wandered around with their friends.  Poor Marcos had to go up the mountain to change because no one watched the tarps for him.  At 10:15 p.m. we had 15 minutes until lights out and couldn't find three of our ten kids.  It was not a happy moment.  We rounded them up and had a pretty serious "tough love" kind of discussion.  We talked to them about the sacrifices that had been put into this trek and that they could choose to get what they wanted out of this experience, but that if they chose not to participate, we'd rather know about it so it wouldn't affect the others.  It left a bitter taste in both of our mouths and I went to bed praying in my heart that things would work out.  I didn't want trek to be a babysitting job.  

The next morning we did a 180.  The kids started pitching in and we didn't even have to ask them to.  We had some time to talk about pioneer stories and that seemed to help set the tone for the day.  It was also Daniel's 14th birthday.  Another boy, Ben, followed him around to keep him away from the wagon and the rest of us worked to decorate the wagon for him.  It helped lighten the mood and everyone loved it.  Daniel wasn't sure why he was being tied up and locked in the port-a-potty, but he was super excited when he came back to see his birthday wagon.  We stopped for a longer lunch and played games, slept, chilled and had birthday rice krispie treats.  Hopefully it helped make his day special.  We were really starting to feel like a family.  After the first day, the second day of six miles or so seemed like nothing.  We actually had time to visit and hang out under the tarps.  That night we had a stake fireside and then a hoedown.  Okay, so at first the kids thought it was a little lame and only the die-hards joined in, but by the end the majority of the kids and adults were participating.  I LOVED it!  I'm a total geek though.  We did several different dances, but the last one was in a square of eight people.  I had the cutest partner, corner (that's the boy on your corner) and boy across from me.  They were so animated as they danced.  I couldn't help but grin from ear to ear as some teenager swung me around and around and doe-si-doed me.  It was awesome!  Good thing we only walked six miles that day because we burned another bucketload of calories during the hoedown.  I was totally sweating.  

After the hoedown, we broke into wards for a little devotional.  Our ward is small, but it was really cool.  The other pa from our ward is in the bishopbrick and since the Bishop couldn't be there, he lead the devotional.  There were the two couples, four young women and four young men.  We were basically the size of a family.  Our discussion wasn't fancy, but it was profound.  First we all went around and told a couple of things about our experience at trek.  What everyone liked about their family and so forth.  For the most part, everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves.  Different people talked about challenges in their families like health problems, communication difficulties, and people that didn't get along with others.  They also talked about how awesome their families were and the competition for who had the best family began.  I talked a little bit about how wrong I was about some of the kids.  It was hard not to pass judgment the first day based on the little bit we knew about them.  Some were grumbling and others wandering off all the time.  As we got to know them, however, we realized how wrong we were about many of them.  After that, the member of the bishopbrick opened up a testimony meeting.  The words spoken were powerful and the Spirit there was so strong.  I love teenagers sometimes.  Their desire for coolness and their need to bear their testimonies is so cute.  It's a balance for them to find the right words to say, hoping no one will think less of them.  Some were simple and others more eloquent, but the Spirit remained the same.  One person talked about the family she was in and how her Pa didn't speak much English.  It was difficult for them to communicate, but she said she learned so much from him because when he bore his testimony, you could feel it.  Another person talked about not understanding the painting called "The Last Hill" until now.  It really was just rolling hill after rolling hill and you always wondered how many more you would have to climb before you reached your destination.  The leaders talked about sacrifice both then and now and how amazing the youth really are.  I felt that too!  It's crazy to me to think that these kids are going to be leading our church in a few years and the need to help guide and direct them hit me hard during this trek.  By the end, we were all crying and freezing.  The sun went down before our hoedown sweat had time to dry so we were in need of some sweatshirts by the end.  It truly was a beautiful meeting though.

That night was so much fun.  Everyone stayed around for family scripture and prayer and then just tucked themselves in bed.  We talked for awhile, losing the tired kids one by one.  We talked to them about each of their individual personalities and how they all add to the family we had become.  Marcos told a bunch of funny mission stories and everyone laughed.  The conversation flowed so naturally - it felt like a real family.  Whatever was on their minds, we talked about.  We even talked about how different they were than what we thought at first and how we need to be careful to give others enough time to show us who they are deep down inside.  

Saturday morning was bitter-sweet.  We were all eager and wanting to make it to "Zion", but knew it was the last time we would spend together.  We got dressed, had breakfast, had family prayer and scriptures and later had a solo experience.  It was awesome!  The kids all went off with their 5 gallon buckets to sit on and read scriptures, wrote in their journals, prayed and pondered.  I really enjoyed the time I had to reflect on what I had learned.  After the solo experience, our family gathered back together and had a testimony meeting.  Marcos started it off and I ended it.  A couple of the kids were pretty shy so when it looked like they needed a little help, I just asked them what they liked about trek and it helped them get their words going.  We ended up hearing a little something from all of them, which is what we were hoping.  Some testimonies were stronger than others, but they all have at least the desire for faith (which is what I was reading during solo time) and that is all that is needed.  I love that scripture.  I think it's in Alma 32 somewhere.  About not needing to have a perfect faith, but having hope.  And that if you can even just desire to have faith, you have started down that road.  I am explaining it horribly, but it hit me pretty hard.  

In some ways this trek was easier for me than real life.  I hated being dirty, hot and tired, but my real life with little kids to teach and take care of sometimes feels just as overwhelming.  The first day Marcos and I were our normal selves and loudly figured out how to do things.  We didn't fight, but we discussed things with less patience than we should have.  By the second day, that didn't happen once.  There was such a need for team work that everyone just pitched in.  With all the lessons and stories we shared about the pioneers it helped me realize that we really are a good team.  We can do anything together and I wouldn't want to have to go through any life experience without him.  

After all the spiritual moments that morning, we packed up and got on our way.  All the water breaks that day seemed so tedious.  We were all so eager to go fast and get there.  But when we had to actually say goodbye, there were a few tears shed.  Luckily I kept it together for the first time the whole trek, but a couple of my girls and even the guys seemed so sad to leave us.  I never thought I could have such an influence on teenagers, but it seemed we must have.  It's weird to me sometimes.  I still think of myself as one of the youth so being the "Ma" was kind of strange.  These kids were looking to us to lead them and I think we did just that.  We got invited to soccer games, a quincianera (15th birthday party) and everyone is dying to have a Uboldi pioneer reunion.  But above all we left with our hearts full and our testimonies strengthened.  Now I know why they put all that work into trek every few years.  It was worth every minute!