The Pursuit Of Happiness

Marcos and I watched Oprah tonight after we put the kids to bed.  It was all about the pursuit of happiness.  I'd seen it before, but it drew me in and I found myself watching the entire episode.  Not that I'm unhappy, but sometimes you have to make a conscious effort to find your happiness.  The psychologist on there talked about what he called destination addiction.  It basically means you're always thinking of the next thing you need or want that will help make you happy - living in the future, not in the present.  Okay, so here it goes.  My name is Maria and I'm a destination-aholic.  Is that how it would go?  I live way too much in the past and future and not nearly enough in the present.  They also touched on the stay-at-home mom and how she seems happy, but is living so much for everyone else and not for herself.  That's a tough one.  Serving others and putting their needs first is noble, but to completely FORGET yourself takes a toll on you.  I forget to eat lunch sometimes even though I feed everyone else because I'm too busy cleaning up and just being a mom.  Then at 2:00, I wonder why I'm starving.  It's all about finding balance and acknowledging your own needs as well.  The other thing that really struck me is how he talked about finding happiness inside ourselves instead of always chasing it.  I get this part - I really do - but I think that's one of the biggest problems we have as a society.  All this debt and greed and getting in over your head to have the biggest and best stuff is all in an effort to find happiness.  We're in a big mess right now because we've been neglecting what matters and seeking happiness in material things.  I have had the privilege of working with some people who have plenty of means and others who have very little and can attest to the fact that money does not buy happiness.  

Okay, so enough of my speech.  I just had to set up my night for you.  What this did for me was cause me to think hard about my own happiness and how I can remain happy through thick and thin.  A few months ago, I was beaming.  I was so happy, it radiated from my very being.  I could feel it and I grinned from the inside out.  I'm not sure what happened, but a part of that is missing right now.  It's not anything major and I don't need an intervention...relax.  It's just hard to maintain that level of happiness what with the whole "opposition in all things".  Part of it is simple and probably stupid.  I am happier when I know I'm doing my best in life and I'm hard on myself when I'm not - no matter what it is I'm working on at the time.  I'm an over-achiever, what can I say?  Anyway, after we watched the show, I headed up to my bedroom for some scripture study and overall meditation.  I read a little in the Book of Mormon and then found myself in the topical guide looking up happiness.  So here's what I learned (or rather reminded myself of) during my little study session.  There was a lot in there about not finding happiness in iniquity but in finding happiness in righteousness.  But one scripture really spoke to me.  It was John 16:33 and it says:

33 These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.

That may have been just what I  needed to focus on this Christmas season.  

So with New Year's resolutions on the brain, this is what I think will be my main focus this year.  Not that I don't have a page-long list of stuff already, but I think this truly is what makes or breaks everything else.  I want to live in the present, have more peace, and maintain my happiness a little bit better by focusing on the good news that is our Savior.